The Life Project: Week 1

Fact: Chameleons (probably) don't like gluten free brownies...

When I was 8 I completed a class project about chameleons. I'm not sure why I chose chameleons but I'm guessing it had something to do with the fact that I had a magazine with an impressive picture of a chameleon on the front and a handy article listing some interesting things about chameleons in.

I'm guessing that's the reason why, because the whole project probably contained about 11 facts all taken from the magazine and it was all done last minute. But the project looked much bigger because it had a fancy A2 piece of card folded into a cover, and oddly enough it ALSO had an impressive picture of a chameleon on the front of it. One identical to the magazine.

Other than the front cover I left the whole project till last minute, and I knew I had done myself and my elasticated tongued reptilian friends an injustice, but I still hoped that the impressive cover would gain me top marks and a prize.

It didn't and ever since I have had a complex about not doing my grand ideas justice.

I can't even count the amount of times I said I was going to spend my summer volunteering, but evidently my dad had kept a log, because in my second year of uni when I said I was going to do something with my summer he said 'Yeah I'll believe that when I see it.' Well it pushed a button. And my tongue flicked out and stuck to a volunteering project as part of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival like it was a big juicy fly and I was a chameleon.

Ever since, I like to think whenever I have said I was going to do something I have done it. That's how Teacup Theatre and Confessions came to be after all. But I am worried that while my life might not be a case of a great A2 cardboard cover and a fancy photograph hiding very little substance, I still cheat myself.

As you may know, I am currently working on 'The Life Project' and the first chapter is dedicated to the Gluten Free challenge, the idea being that I test my will power. But to date I am yet to find it all that challenging, and the one morning I was presented with only the option of a chain coffee cake for breakfast, I just went with a gluten free brownie. Which if you ignore the look of odd syrupy bits is quite nice. It should be, disappointingly, it contains just as many calories.

So we are 1 week in and I officially contain no gluten, however, my complex is kicking in and to prove that the Life Project and myself aren't just replacing wheat with a load of hot air, my next challenge to be completed by the NEXT THURSDAY is to submit an article pitch to one of my favourite publications.

I'm not going to tell you what it will be about (don't want to jinx it) but safe to say, it won't be about chameleons.